Tiffanie Scott Kelly sent me a message last night that is funny, but all too true:
Overheard in the Newsroom #3790: During a conversation about demise of pay phones: Editor: “Where would Superman change nowadays?” Reporter: “Change? Where would he work?”
Indeed, while the soulless corporation that owns The Daily Planet hasn’t disclosed the fact, my sources indicate that Clark Kent was indeed one of those recently laid off at that venerable Metropolis institution.
He was joined by Lois Lane, editor Perry White, and about 40 others in this particular round of cuts.
The paper kept Jimmy Olsen because, his being a cub reporter, they didn’t have to pay him much. Jimmy is now writing most of the metro-area news copy, shooting all photos for his stories, blogging, filing constant Twitter updates, producing all the pages in the Metro section on QuarkXpress, proofing them himself (which explains all the errors Metropolitans are seeing), and doing it all for the same low pay. Oh, and he has to take two unpaid weeks furlough.
Jimmy is starting to realize that Clark, Lois and Perry were the lucky ones. His life is more complicated than ever, aside from all the extra work. A couple of times when he’s activated his signal watch lately Superman didn’t show up, and once when he did he was all testy and peevish about being bothered. At one point, Jimmy could have sworn he heard the Man of Steel mutter, “You‘ve got a job — help your own damn’ self.”
Perry took early retirement. Lois has a blog that is starting to make money from subscriptions — she spends a lot of time sitting in front of her live Webcam in various states of undress (hey, it’s a living!). Clark has had the toughest time. He apparently has a “job” that he remains secretive about. It used to be his “second job” when he was at the paper. It keeps him busy, but it doesn’t pay. He needs a paying gig, and doesn’t care much about the benefits (although he has puzzled several prospective employers by asking cryptically about “kryptonite insurance”). Trouble is, there aren’t many jobs out there.
And he’s picky. He requires special working conditions, for reasons he won’t disclose. It was great being a reporter, because unexplained absences went unremarked — no editor truly knows where a reporter is, as long as he gets his copy in. (He could be Tweeting from a bar, and probably is.)
So it’s tough. And all I can say is Clark, welcome to the club.
(Hey, isn’t that great art I found to go with this? It’s from this cover, which appears to be roughly from the years when I read comics. THIS, to me, is what Clark Kent looks like. Or like this.)
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Are you calling Adam Beam Jimmy Olsen?
Some mainstream magazine (Metropolitan Home?) recently did an issue about working from home or home office design, so they all worked from home. Many found it preferable to a long, expensive commute. It sure would make it hard, though, to set a drama in a virtual office. Imagine All the President’s Men, but they all worked from home.
Reporters can’t work from home. The wastrels need editors to keep them in line.
Actually, Woodward and Bernstein DID do some work at home, and more importantly, out on the street (which unfortunately too few reporters have time for). But the collaboration was born in a newsroom, and had to be. Note the wonderful scene in which Woodward puts his copy on the initial breakin, take by take, into the city desk basket, and the presumptuous Bernstein grabs it, take by take, and puts it in his own typewriter to rewrite it.
Also, there are the critical moments when Ben Bradlee dropped by their desks on his way out of the building to check on them and provide rough guidance, and the important interactions with the other editors — if the metro editor hadn’t fought fiercely for them, they would have been off the story as soon as it started to grow beyond a mere break-in. (The argument from national staff was that they weren’t up to following it into the White House.)
A newspaper is a collaborative and social mechanism. A solitary person can’t put out a whole daily newspaper by himself, and it wouldn’t be a good thing if he could. The collaboration is too important, however talented the individuals.
That underlines the absurdity of the old TV show with George Reeves (still the best Superman, by the way). They had Clark working in a private office rather than a city room. I guess staging a city room, episode after episode, with the complexity of the set and all the extras in the background, was just too expensive for the series’ producers. (They could probably manage it if they were showing a newsroom in 2010 — you’d only need three or four people moving in the background to get it right. That’s not an exaggeration — go visit a newsroom today.)
Sure, it was convenient for Clark — he didn’t even have to excuse himself to change, just strip down to his supersuit and bound out the window. But it gave no sense at all that he worked for a newspaper.
“he paper kept Jimmy Olsen because, his being a cub reporter, they didn’t have to pay him much. Jimmy is now writing most of the metro-area news copy, shooting all photos for his stories, blogging, filing constant Twitter updates, producing all the pages in the Metro section on QuarkXpress, proofing them himself (which explains all the errors Metropolitans are seeing), and doing it all for the same low pay.”
That explains the heinous conglomeration of misspelled words, incorrect grammar, and incongruous text that passes for reporting these days.
Maude said, “That explains the heinous conglomeration of misspelled words, incorrect grammar, and incongruous text that passes for reporting these days.” Who is responsible for the stupid editorials? Scoppe and Bolton are SO far over their heads….
Actually, I think they’re doing fine. I’ve been favorably impressed by the quality of the first endorsements they’ve done without me. Doesn’t mean I agree with all of them, but they’re well done.
Yep, Scoppe and Bolton are decent writers and/or well-edited. I may not agree with them, but at least I don’t have to cringe my way through their pieces like I do with the daily reporting.
I asked Adam Beam if he felt like Jimmy Olsen. His response, “I am Superman.” I asked if he was laid off; I’m awaiting his reply.
Maude–
Don’t forget the wire service articles stopped mid-sentence….
Thanks for the update. I haven’t kept up with Superman since I was a teenager.
Is Capital Newsstand still in business?