The State Grand Jury is hurting my feelings

Everybody I know is getting called before the State Grand Jury. The latest:

University of South Carolina Harris Pastides was one of the people who testified this week to the State Grand Jury in a secret session.

“He was called as a fact witness,” university spokesman Wes Hickman told The State newspaper Thursday morning in answer to a query.

Pastides is one of an unknown number of people who have testified in an ongoing public corruption probe involving the public relations firm of Richard A. Quinn….

Pam Lackey, Trey Walker. Now Harris? Who hasn’t been called? Next thing you know, John Monk’s going to write that Lizard Man was sighted entering the Grand Jury room.

Future witness?

Future witness?

I’ll tell you who hasn’t been called: Me! What am I? Chopped liver?

Of course, I don’t know anything about the subject of the investigation beyond what I read in the papers. I’d have nothing to tell. You might as well call anybody at random off the street. But I’m not entirely sure, given this growing list of luminaries, that knowing anything about the matter at hand is a prerequisite.

Any of y’all been called? I wouldn’t be surprised. When and where will it all end, Mr. Natural?

5 thoughts on “The State Grand Jury is hurting my feelings

  1. Brad Warthen Post author

    Just kidding, Mr. Pascoe, sir!

    Seriously, this string of sightings will probably continue until everybody on that chart The State keeps showing — the one with all the lines leading from Richard Quinn to every ranking Republican in the state, plus others — has made an appearance.

    That would seem to be the plan, anyway…

    Reply
      1. Claus2

        Expect a call shortly with the conversation starting out, “Mr. Warthen… you’re familiar with Mr. Quinn and his son aren’t you?”…

        Reply

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