Come back when you’re ready to behave

OK, the bartender just did the bouncer part of his job.

I’ve been slack on a number of things lately, and one of them is tossing out unruly patrons. We just had yet another barroom brawl, and this time I didn’t just shake my head and keep cleaning the glasses. I went into this post and reduced the comments from 26 to 9. I cut out ALL the subsequent comments from offenders, not just their worst infractions.

Here are some excerpts from the rantings of the people I tossed out through the swinging doors and into the dusty street:

  • "Really, are you the stupidest person in the world?" (Guess who?)
  • "Your comments demonstrate complete and utter intellectual impotence."
  • "If they make ethical Viagra, consider speaking to your doctor."
  • "Mary, go change your feminine hygiene pad and leave the war strategy to men."
  • "The mad dog wingnuts were dangerous enough before they were cornered by their blind ideology and incompetency."

Admittedly, that last one is on the cusp of acceptability, but I had already let him get away with a bunch of stuff that was teetering right on the edge. When you’re breaking up a brawl, you have to throw out some of those who are merely egging the fighters on, and he had just said "mad dog wingnuts" once too often.

Y’all come back now, y’hear — after you’ve sobered up enough to engage in a rational, civil conversation. Argue all you like — but exhibit a modicum of respect for those who disagree.

14 thoughts on “Come back when you’re ready to behave

  1. chrisw

    I wrote “Your comments demonstrate complete and utter intellectual impotence”
    Wow…what a terrible horrible comment. I see that being on the opposite side of an argument with Brad can have one censored for very little. I will endeavor to say nothing of consequence, and to agree with the boss. In fact, I suspect I should beat the boss to the punch, and volunteer to say nothing at all.

  2. Brad Warthen

    Actually, you weren’t saying that to me, but to someone else. The context was, “Doug… Thanks (sic) you for making my point. Your comments demonstrate complete and utter intellectual impotence.”
    Don’t worry; Doug got thrown out right after you, for his Viagra crack.
    Welcome back, though. Don’t sulk.

  3. chrisw

    You cut my remarks. My mon no longer does my laundry. My banker moved to Scottsdale. The Dems take over in DC. Nancy Peolosi is speaker of the house…and u tell me not to sulk!
    Sulk is just the beginning, bib boy. It may be time to dust off that Gin bottle I have been saving.
    Sulk…u don’t know world class sulking till u have seen me sulk! U will rue the day u asked me not to sulk…

  4. Ready to Hurl

    For the sake of accuracy, that was the first time that I characterized wingnuts as mad dogs. But it seemed so apropos.
    Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.

  5. Mary Rosh

    Well, you left in Mark’s comment, which includes this question:
    “Brad is more responsible than the rest of us because he pushed this debacle from day one, yet Brad still refuses to take responsibility for his grievous errors. Maybe Mary is right. Maybe Brad is stupid. Is it stubborn pride or stupidity that causes Brad to continually screw up? You make the call.”
    So I can’t complain too much. Of course, we all know that your concern for “civility” is a sham. If you wanted civility, you would conduct yourself in a civil way. It’s not civility that you want, but deference. You resent the fact that some random commenter can show you up, pointing out facts you overlooked or ignored.
    For example, you spent all that time fantasizing about how Saddam Husseein’s execution constituted a step toward a free and democratic Iraq, and spent more time cobbling together your remarks about it. It looks like you didn’t see the video of the execution, or any clips or captures of the video that appeared on the TV news, and didn’t read anything about how the execution was actually conducted, and so you didn’t really know what you were talking about.
    I assembled a few facts about what really happened (not too hard) and blew your conclusions apart. You could keep me from doing that in the future by working harder, by finding out more about what you were writing about, and by setting forth your reasoning in an honest way, but you aren’t capable of doing that, or don’t want to do it. So you pretend you’re interested in “civility.” Easier for you than admitting you’re wrong, I guess.

  6. kc

    Hey, y’all. How’s that whole “civility” thing going?
    If you wanted civility, you would conduct yourself in a civil way. – Mary Rosh
    I’m inclined to agree with Mary here. Now Mary’s not very civil, but then neither are you, Mr. W, in my book, even though you don’t use any naughty words. I commend you for that, but it doesn’t you make you any more civil than, say, moi. I’m sure you don’t intend to be incivil, Mr. W, but when you (to use but one example) say that people who oppose the Iraq invasion hate Bush so much that they’re rooting for America to fail, that’s really not very civil, is it? Or “rational?”
    For example, you spent all that time fantasizing about how Saddam Husseein’s execution constituted a step toward a free and democratic Iraq, and spent more time cobbling together your remarks about it. It looks like you didn’t see the video of the execution, or any clips or captures of the video that appeared on the TV news, and didn’t read anything about how the execution was actually conducted, and so you didn’t really know what you were talking about.
    Again, I think Mary has a really good point here. Your post about the execution was really astonishing. It told me that you had no fu . . . no idea what had happened. Or that you knew and just didn’t give a sh. . . a rip, which is even worse.
    Hussein’s execution was more like a lynching. A gang of hooded, taunting thugs, chanting “Moqtada, Moqtada” (do you even know who “Moqtada” IS? Maybe you should try Googling it. I bet McClatchy has some articles out there about him) conduct an unruly, undignified, BARBARIC execution and you just toss off this airy, above-it-all “well, glad that’s over with” post.
    You think what happened is a GOOD thing? Do you really think this advances your shining ideas of freedom and democracy and justice and dignity?

  7. Doug

    This is the last post I will make
    on this blog. Your sanctimonious
    censorship is laughable. The value
    of your vanity blog has run its course.
    As they said in the old West,
    “… and the horse you rode in on”.

  8. Brad Warthen

    Let’s see: I’m standing outside a hospital ER at 11:52 p.m., waiting for MY turn to go in and see my daughter, hoping they’ve started the IV that I’m pretty sure she needs (you know how it is in a state that refuses to adequately fund mental health or other essential services — if you have an emergency, you’ll be treated in a hallway if you’re lucky enough to get treated at all), and I’ve paused to check in on you folks for a minute.
    Thanks for helping me feel better for not having spent much time on the blog lately.
    See you later. Maybe.

  9. kc

    Well, for heaven’s sake, we didn’t know about that.
    Don’t know what’s going on, but you have my sincere best wishes for her full recovery, Mr. W.
    A family member of mine spent the first few months of ’06 in a hospital. A few words of friendly advice, from my family’s experience: Stay with your daughter, or have some other family member or friend stay with her as much as possible, in the room. Do NOT be afraid or sheepish or embarrassed to speak up to the staff if you think or even suspect she’s not getting what she needs or she’s not getting it fast enough or ANYTHING. I don’t mean to alarm you or freak you out, but the hospitals are understaffed and the staff they have is busy and frazzled, and so help me, the squeaky wheel is gonna get the grease. Be polite, be CIVIL, be articulate to the nursing staff and the docs, but be vigilant and do not hesitate to be assertive on her behalf.
    Again, truly, I hope your daughter gets better soon. Good luck.

  10. Ready to Hurl

    Brad, you and your daughter have my sincerest best wishes for her full and speedy recovery.
    I would attribute you snippy, self-righteous reply to critics (using her condition as a slap at us) to a parent’s worry except that it’s so characteristic of your pettiness.
    Again, my best wishes for you and your daughter in the hospital. Also, kc’s advice is spot-on. Follow it.

  11. chrisw

    Hi Brad…
    My best to your daughter and family. I will keep you all in my prayers.
    Your comments about state investment goes directly to my heart. I am in an unusual situation in that I am an extremely high income earner, but spend a great deal of time with the poor. This skews my world view in such a manner that I am at “home”…nowhere.
    My wealthy friends just can not understand or empathize with the poor and needy. Some try, but most just don’t get it. The poor I deal with can not understand the philosophical or pragmatic arguments of conservatives (and some wealthy folks)…so I remain in no mans land.
    The reason I bring this up is when I look at the state budget and see the billions we spend, and what we spend it on, I cringe…but I have no one to tell, or no one that will listen. We could easily fund the type of people infrastructure you mention if it were not for the pet projects of the powerful and influential, and the mind-boggling inefficiencies of state government.
    For just one example, USC announced nearly 15 million dollars to be spent on a “campus within a campus” to tutor athletes. Wow…that bogglers my mind, as, err…isn’t USC full of classrooms, computers and tutors already? And could not the 15,000,000 be used to subsidize students in a manner that requires them to work in fields such as mental health, poverty, and health?
    I don’t mean to use your problems as a platform. I just wanted to remark that as we live in times of such wealth, our thinking is still in the 70’s, and that the way of the future requires civil discourse, but also the willingness to slay the scared cows of our past.

  12. Brad Warthen

    She’s stable. They’ve gotten four liters of fluid in her, which brought down her heart rate and brought up her blood pressure, both good signs. She got an ER room shortly after my last comment. They want to admit her (inconclusive blood work), but there are no regular beds available, so she’s still in the ER. She’s feeling stronger.
    I’m at the office, trying to throw together a Sunday column.

  13. Dave

    Brad, I hope your daughter is on the way to improvement and good health soon.

    On the subject of spending and our economy, if the true poor of the world came here and watched how poor we are, that is if you listen to politicians like John Edwards, they would likely lose their minds over the illogic. Poor in America usually own at least one car, have 2 color tvs, have a cellphone, and seldom ever miss a meal. And the street hobos dont count, as 98% of them are exactly where they want to be, roaming the streets without a care in the world. And then we have the $500,000 raise for Steve Spurrier. How’s that for the common working man and woman of America. More power to Steve to get all he can for himself, but the next time the USC president announces a nice tuition or “fee” increase, I hope the State can show a sense of humor on that score. Although Alabama trumped USC bigtime with a $30 million dollar contract for Nick Saban. When you see these things, one can only laugh at the politicians bemoaning the plight of the poor in this nation.


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